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  Firmas Invitadas - Edición Nº 157
Semana del 04/03/2005
Mosieur le president
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Óscar Molina
E STIMÉS anfants de la patrí:

Je sui enchante de la vi de vous parler icí, en la France. Je aime la France mogollón et je adore le camembert, le croissant, la grandeur, et la fraternite a tutiplén.

Le premiere chose que je ve, es demander pardon por la politique de mon detestable predeceseur, le garçon del mostache, le fasciste inigualable, le grand cabron, Aznar, el amí de los americains que fair les choses plus bien que mua en generel, mais es un porc reactionaire. Nous avons retorné a la anterior situation, et est mon intention proclamer ici que nous sommes otre foi la Espagne progresiste, nous avons retorne a la notre vocation de filles de servir a la France. La votre humillation est un plaisir pour nous, les progresistes, et nous sommes tres entusiasts de dir que nous conformons, porcuá il est plus de precieux un gorrion en la main, que cent gaviots dans le ciel.

Madame et Mesiés, je sui un mocetón, je sui el melleur, et je sui le campeon de la liberté, la egalité et la fraternité. Mais je ve compartir avec vous la mon invention: le talant. Cet inventión moi coroné como le Roi Soleil del Progresisme, avec la tolerance de mon ami Chirac, un derechiste decente. Je pas a vous expliquer.

Le talant es posible avec la designation de Ministres como Mesié Moratinos- Ni putain idee de vinos- qui adore le Bourdeaux, et ais une collection des amís internationales tres important: Mesié Chaves, tres refiné. Mesié Castro, tres libertaire. Et Mesié Arafat, tres rigide maintenant mais bocú de sonriente avant, avec la paste ganse en son conte bancaire de la Suisse. Avec Mesié Moratinos nous avons lancé la Aliance des Civilizations, qui a peu de aceptación pour el moment, mais nous confions que conté cete semane avec un nouveu pais tres important: la gloriose Somalia.

Pour le talant vous necesité filles como Carmen Calvo, qui est un peu pegué en latín et en Cervantes, mais est une bonne roture por un descosé, purcua est un fille valiente qui di las sa gilipolleces avec plus de gracé. Nous avons decidon pour le talant que la melleur promotion pour notre filles est la photographie publicitaire. Avec la estrategie del “Vogue” nous avons arrimé la pierre candente a la notre sardine avec inteligence, purcua notres filles pense que sont plus belles que les filles de Aznar, putons desorejés, et son travail lamentable est imperceptible.

Nous avons une invention urbanistique: la solution habitationelle, qui nous ensayons avec peu de fortune en la rue de Carmelo, dans la Catalogne independent. Mais nous sommes secures de que en las fois sucesives nous pas de fair otre dasiguisé com ça. Notre idee est culper Aznar pour le Carmelo, et nous sommes dans la recherche de la innegable relation avec le “Prestige”.

Dans la Espagne la Primavere est retorné avec moi; je suis un expert en la fustigation de la droite innombrable, je puteé plus fuoriose a les catoliques et je lancé la maison dans la fenetre avec le subvention a mon amis del cinema progresiste. Avec moi, en la Espagne las manifestaions son finí, purcua des espagnols necesitons de la tranquilité que je doné. Il ny a pas motifs pour salir a la rue purcua nous les progresistes sommes pas de especulateurs et guerreurs. Nous avons les votants de la droite acojoné purcua notre Alain Delon del Talant, Pepiño Blanc, ha dit publiquement les noms des barriads que sont pas progresistes et les fascistes sont conscients de que les pommes de terre et les tomatés pouvé voler a son tetes a la premiere de change.

Je suí ici aussí pour vous deslumbrer avec la inteligence qui adorne mon personne. Je ai des idees geniales pour apliquer et revitalizer la notre Europe. Je proposé que nous façons une Ley pour la cual Zidane peu pas de jubiler. Anotre pour prohibir ganer le Tour de France plus de cuatre fois, cete est por Amstrong qui est americain et pour lo tant un maricón.

Je aussi veux dir que il est important que nous cambions le leitmotiv de la Europe pour une afirmation tres originel de mon coseche: “Fait l´amour, pas la guerre”, et je ve proponer convertir mon Sonsoles la muse oficielle de la Europe Unité, de la main de la peleter progresiste Benarroch. Je ve apliquer la igualité a topé, avec la prohibition de detener beaocup de terroristes vasques que terroristes de otres nationalités. Soulement en el moment que il y a terroristes de la Belgique, Allemaigne, Italie, etc… dan le trulló, nous pouvons detener un terrorist vasque. Je ve proponer aussi que des ciudadennes americaines peu pas entrer dans la Europe sin firmer un papier avec une declaration qui dit “Je pas voté a Bush, qui est un bujarrón”. Cete que je apelle le talant dans la versión international.

Pour finalicer je ve soliciter un favor. Vous les francaises sont a partir un pignon avec les americains, et nous avons un peu de problem en la relation avec des Imperialistes. Es que est posible que vous nous echons una main avec Mr. Bush??? Je necesité le favor personalment purcua mon cul est rosé de la cantité ingente de vaseline que je usé pour lui complacer, mais il no est pas tres amigable avec moi, et je ne se pas purcuá. Probalement mon perfil progresiste est tres compliqué et sofistiqué por un criateur de vaches comme lui.

Au revoir.
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Edición 173 - Movimiento rojiblanco de liberación
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Edición 172 - Las manos en las que estamos
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Edición 171 - Mikel
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Edición 170 - Francia
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Edición 169 - La onda expansiva
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Edición 168 - Nunca es triste la verdad...
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Edición 167 - La caballería y las picas
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Edición 166 - Esperanzadora Esperanza
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Edición 165 - Menudo negocio
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Edición 164 - La quiebra de España
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Edición 163 - Venga, politicemos todo
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Edición 162 - El talante se queda sentado
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Edición 161 - El vídeo
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Edición 160 - La guerra ha terminado
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Edición 159 - ¿Queremos saber?
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Edición 158 - Como los cangrejos
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Edición 156 - Carta abierta a Rodríguez Zapatero
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Edición 155 - Yo he votado 'no'
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Edición 154 - Carta de un soldado de Flandes (III)
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Edición 153 - Las íes sobre sus puntos
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Edición 152 - Vuelven los grises
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Edición 151 - No lo veo claro
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Edición 150 - Cerrando puertas, abriendo heridas
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Edición 149 - España no es España
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Edición 147 - Escenarios
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Edición 146 - Querida Señora
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Edición 145 - ZP no tiene un plan
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Edición 144 - Matones
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Edición 143 - Ser del ‘Atleti’
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Edición 142 - Chorradas de cuota
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Edición 141 - Sin identidad
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Edición 140 - Se aguó la fiesta
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Edición 139 - Yak 42: cagadas y chapoteos
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Edición 138 - Carta de un soldado de Flandes (2)
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Edición 137 - Irak, en la encrucijada
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Edición 136 - Los cagapoquitos
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Edición 135 - Educación para la ciudadanía
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Edición 134 - Producciones ZP
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Edición 133 - Los balcones del tonto
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Edición 132 - Tu foto, vuestra foto
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Edición 131 - Los talantazos de los santos inocentes
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Edición 130 - Huelgas
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Edición 129 - El talento de Mr. Shoemaker
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Edición 128 - La reunión, en casa del ‘mullah’ Omar
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Edición 127 - Por el Norte y por el Sur
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Edición 126 - ¿Quién ha sido?
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Edición 125 - ¡Más madera!
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Edición 124 - Del Pluralismo hacia la Nada
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Edición 123 - Terroristas ‘cum laude’
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Edición 122 - ¿Son buenos los nuevos tiempos de la aviación comercial?
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Edición 121 - Antiamericanismo de saldo
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Edición 120 - El final de la luna de miel
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Edición 119 - Carta de un soldado de Flandes
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Edición 118 - La primavera de Medem
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Edición 117 - Los errores del PP
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Edición 116 - Torturas y dobles raseros
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Edición 115 - La pérdida de España
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Edición 114 - Las cosas de comer
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Edición 113 - Lo que nos jugamos en Irak
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Edición 112 - El erial ideológico
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Firmas
_
Abel Abascal
Alberto Acereda
Alfonso Berroya
Alfredo Amestoy
Álvaro Peña
Amilibia
Antonio Castro Villacañas
Antonio Martín Beaumont
Borja Álvarez
Carmen Planchuelo
Enrique de Aguinaga
Ernesto Ladrón de Guevara
Eulogio López
Félix Arbolí
Francisco Daunis
Gabriela Ardiles
Germán Lopezarias
Honorio Feito
Hugo Alberto de Pedro (Buenos Aires)
Ignacio San Miguel
Ismael Medina
Javier del Valle
Javier Neira
Jesús Ansebar
Jesús Pozo
Joan Pla
Joaquín Abad
José A. Baonza
José Luis Navas
José Manuel G. Torga
José Manuel G. Torga
José María Moncasi de Alvear
José Meléndez
Juan Pablo Mañueco
Juan Urrutia
Julen Urrutia
Luis Irazu
Manuel Salvador Morales
María del Mar García Aguiló
Marta Rivera de la Cruz
Matías J. Ros
Miguel Ángel García Brera
Miguel Ángel Loma
Miguel Martínez
Nieves Concostrina
Óscar Molina
Pancho Linde
Pascual de Bustares
Ramón Sánchez
Ricardo Navas-Ruiz
Vasco Lourinho (Portugal)
Víctor Corcoba
Wenceslao Pérez Gómez
Wifredo Espina
Yolanda Cruz
Yolanda Salanova
Zain Deane (Nueva York)
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